I am really feeling lost lately, faith wise that is. I am Catholic, I was born and raised Catholic, but I have been away from the church for quite some time now.
I do believe in the Eucharist and really miss it, but I cannot seem to reconcile "my" feelings with the politics of the church to blindly follow the faith.
I feel like such a hypocrite going to mass, since I am at such polar opposites with some of the things the church says I must believe,or adhere to in order to be a member of the church.
I know that if I live in line with my faith, I can recieve the Eucharist, and I do, but there are just so many things that I don't agree with, and that I never will.
The final straw was when the church was going on a "gay" hunt to try to weed out and get rid of any and all gay priests. And not allowing gay men to become priests. IMO a gay man can take a vow of celibacy and serve God in the church just like a straight man can, if they pass all the other requirements and are commited to a life of priesthood, why shouldn't they be allowed to be a priest?
Another thing is that if a couple cannot consumate a marriage, ie, one is disabled and cannot have sex, than that couple is not allow to marry in the Catholic church. There is something very wrong with that picture!
I don't know. I really, really miss the Eucharist. Can I still recieve with the feelings that I have?
Hawaii
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About Me
- Teresa
- I have been married to the love of my life for 23 years. We have 4 children who are 23, 21, 18 and 17, and are expecting our first grandchild in November. I work in surgery part time at Phoenix Children's Hospital, and thankfully I like my job because of benefits I am stuck. Since working there I have been diagnosed with Scleroderma, so am uninsurable. God put me there for a reason! Scleroderma has defintely impacted my life in a huge way, but I am not going to let it take over my life. It has taught me to value every day and everyone so much more. I am truly a better person because of the disease.
5 comments:
{{{{{{{{{{{{{Teresa}}}}}}}}}} I can understand some of your feelings. During my conversion, I had lots of questions, had hurt feelings over some things until I learned the truth. I HIGHLY recommend you talk to a good priest about how you're feeling. If you'd like I can give you the email of an awesome priest here (he even does online chats) that you can talk to. He's an excellent teacher and explains things quite well. Let me know. In the meantime, I'll be praying for you.
God's calling out to you! He wants you back but you have to make that first step.
I agree with Michelle. Find a good priest and sit down and really talk. Maybe he can help you with your feelings. Before we became Catholic, I had issues too. During our classes, suddenly everything made sense to me and the teaching of the Church seemed so logical. I hope that you can find someone to talk to who can help you.
Teresa,
I got to your blog from Caroline's blog! I just wanted to say that I could have WRITTEN your post. I was born and raised Catholic. And now that I have children of my own, I'm not sure I can raise them Catholic. For starters my dh and I were not married in a Catholic church because I was married before. Even though my first husband cheated on me from 6 months after we were married until we split. Now I have to be damned because of it? Lots and lots of issues I have. Yet I feel like a trader if I leave. So I don't do anything and don't go to church, which makes me feel WORSE! I have been wanting to try a Methodist or Presbyterian church.
Anyway, I wanted you to know your not alone :)
Kristi
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Teresa}}}}}}}}}}}
{{{{{{{Kristi,}}}}} I hope I'm not being too forward but from your brief description it sounds like you have grounds to obtain an annulment. Please contact the Tribunal office in your diocese to see about an annulment.
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